Variety Amateur Hour

Like I was tellin' Ricky Saturday,

Salons: people with bad haircuts giving people bad haircuts.

Also, has any guy ever gotten a good haircut? I don't think that has ever happened.

How much would you have to pay an NFL official to celebrate along with that team that just scored the touchdown?

Beyonce is the hottest woman ever and the Single Ladies video is conclusive evidence.

I think I tried sometime last year to get people all worked up about Fishers. Consider this the Fisher revival.
Facts about Fishers

Kingdom: Animalia
Phylum: Chordata
Class: Mammalia
Order: Carnivora
Family: Mustelidae
Genus: Martes
Species: Martes pennanti
Makes noises like: the squeal of a baby placed naked on its back on a cold rock with a pipin' hot BBQ skewer shoved in its foot.
Its teeth are so sharp that: it can enter your house by chewing through your foundation.

Milwaukee is a segregated city. The anecdotes and statistics in this article are difficult to stomach, but I suppose it would be naiive of me to be surprised. Neighborhoods there are homogeneous. I experienced an instance of this when I went to an art show on the South side in a Latino area. We saw some interactive video installations done by UW-Milwaukee art students, and there were some inspired projects. The art department has some nice display areas. This one was the lobby of an apartment building with white plaster and pale limestone walls. Anyway, we left the show and wandered the neighborhood in search of a tavern. We stopped to spend a few minutes basking in stony-white, twice reflected light - once off of the moon, which was full, and then off an old limestone church. Unadulterated light. Don't-make-them-like-that-anymore churches abound in Milwaukee. A tavern's red neon lights were barely visible two blocks down a sidestreet. It looked like a brothel. And we expected to be the only three white dudes there. Turns out we were the only three white dudes there, but there wasn't a hostile crowd giving us the eye: there wasn't a crowd. There were three 45-50 year old women and an older male bartender, who was Colombian. He nursed from an enormous mug aggressively. On two non-plasma roundscreen TVs, numerous scantily clad Latina vixens gyrated. There was a small wood floor for dancing, and two of the women would dance drunkenly while the other sat at the bar and smoked. After a few minutes, the sitter would tap in and a dancer would take a break. There was a disco ball and several sets of primary colored lights adorned the corners of the ceiling. We talked with the bartender, who was hard of hearing (initially we thought he didn't speak English). Apparently he just opened the bar two weeks ago and only keeps it open on Fridays from like 5-11 pm. Hell yeah, just give 'em what they need: them's the glory hours of any week! The bottom line is, this bar is fucking tight and I wish I lived in Milwaukee so I could go there every single Friday. A Miller Lite bottle was $3 though. Kind of weak.

This has been a heartbreaking season for the Green Bay Packers.

I really like this video. I saw it on Sasha Frere-Jones' website. I think this band reminds me of a hybrid Kings of Leon (when they were good) and The Libertines.

EDIT: Whoa I didn't realize this band was a little bit older than I thought. Formed in 1999, albums in '03, '05, '06, '07.

2ND EDIT: I still stand by A.R.E. Weapons - "Fuck What You Like," but either I don't get the irony or their song about Times Square is terrible.

Also, French Horn Rebellion are tight! You gotta watch their videos - the songs themselves don't do the guys justice. They're from Milwaukee but apparently they live in Brooklyn a.k.a. the center of the entire fucking Universe.

this is post 101

i frequently suffer from bouts of extreme depression - usually when i'm walking from one place to another, listening to my ipod, and feeling oh so alone. sometimes it's the song, or the weather, or every pretty girl i pass by. this time it was all three, as an 8-minute remix of "golden cage" by the whitest boy alive came on, a gust of wind buffetted my face, and a gorgeous blonde walked by with purple boots, a purple scarf, and a copy of surely you're joking, mr. feynman! under her arm. i will never get to kiss that girl!

what surprises me about dance songs is the way they can affect me. you mention house, techno or electro to someone, and their mind jumps to some coked out, ecstasy-laden club where everyone's drinking red bull vodkas and finding new ways to air hump to sound waves. yet i've been listening to dance music almost exclusively for the last year, and i still come across songs that make me feel a whole array of emotions. it's a way a song uses the beat to drive home a beautiful melody, or to slowly seep a fuzzy synth through your head. repetition kills you, repetition drugs you, repetition allows your heart to mindlessly soak up a feeling. for me, it's also because i've always been one to focus on the music part of a song, rather than the lyrics. honestly, i could care less for words. it's all french to me.

the whitest boy alive - golden cage (fred falke remix)

sebastien tellier - roche (breakbot remix)

on a happier note - i'm learning to cook fried rice! this is my second time, and hopefully it turns out better. i wish someone else was here to try it with me.

Accidental Mid-Occidental Festival

So Madison is in the midst of an accidental music festival. Two nights ago I saw Best Friends Forever (Minneapolis!), Best Fwends and Matt & Kim. Did any of you guys see Best Fwends open for Japanther at school about 2 years ago? They were really amusing then. This time around they were stellar. In the end, though, Best Friends Forever stole the show!

Last night I saw Disappears, Times New Viking and Deerhunter. Disappears were a tidal wave of distortion and intensity (everything else lost within), Times New Viking were great (but not much better than their album, which, like I said, is great).

But Deerhunter! Wow I have a new favorite band! Bradford Cox always annoyed the shit out of me. Maybe I was feeling tolerant last night, maybe he's not that bad. (Really, he's just a nice guy puttin' on a rock show!)

That band though rocked SO hard and writes SUCH good songs. Long, acutely-constructed, hard-rocking SONGS, MAN! I've been listening to a ton of Sonic Youth lately, and this show was right up that alley. So. Good. I cried...

And tonight I'm seeing No Age and Titus Andronicus.

this blog is about me (directly)

my name is leon leon leon, and i am nearing the last minutes of the work day, so everything seems to slowwwwwwww down. i'm loving my new fashion style because it involves snappy business wear paired with sweet ass racing shoes (i think theyre racing shoes because they have a checkered stripe on the back). i'm trying out boxer-briefs because i think they make my butt look good, also, i like a tight package. i'm listening to house music.

house usually sucks, because it's what you normally hear while shopping at armani exchange. and usually if you're shopping at armani exchange, you're a douchebag. so it works, in a way.

but some of the best house comes from the top producer/dj/musicians ever - namely, the guys in daft punk. of course, daft punk is considered "french house" to some, but they've put out stuff on other names that's much more house-oriented and less pop-accessible. think less "harder better faster stronger" and more "one more time".

daft punk is thomas bangalter and guy-manuel de homem-christo.

thomas bangalter was part of the short-lived group stardust, that put out the immensely popular song "music sounds better with you", along with alan braxe and vocalist benjamin diamond. he was also part of another duo called together with dj falcon, another top-notch dj.

alan braxe is in his own rights a sick french house producer, and works all the time with a dude called fred falke. any track with either of their names on it is going to be fucking banging - with both of them, it's going to be off the hook.

guy-manuel de homem-christo has his own duo with eric chedeville called le knight club. do yourself a favor and download any track by, or remixed by le knight club. how these guys continue to bring such a fresh funky groove to dance music year after year is insane.

o yea, he also produced an album for a little someone called sebastien tellier!!! sexuality dropped in 2008, clashed electro and r&b, and spawned a slew of bloghouse remixes.

thus ends our brief segment of the more you know: daft punk edition!



i'll upload some tracks onto here when i get home. though i dont know if anyone even downloads what i post - do you?

um HELLO

so wtf is the deal just when i start posting again yall slows down. sucka butt! yesterday, while watching cool hand luke (paul newman is so classically beautiful, i want to stare into his eyes all day. i've never seen a paul newman movie before. my boss started a dvd club here at work) we saw the puppies of mysterious puppycam (why? where? who? can i have one?) burrow under their bedding, being all unbearably cute. i spend a not insignificant portion of my day watching those lil tykes romp about

i was also catching up on episodes of my favorite game show, never mind the buzzcocks. if you've never seen it, you should (episodes are on youtube) - it's a british celeb-pop quiz show that is more the view than jeopardy. hosted by simon amstell, a terrificly sarcastic basard (you might remember him from popworld, where he made britney spears cry during an interview), the show frequently has top musicians and actors on who basically spend the entire show making fun of themselves, each other, and amy winehouse. oh yeah, she was also on the show too, being fantastically drunk.

one part of the show, called 'identity parade', has each team try to spot a musical artist out of a line-up of five people. it's embarassingly rude (and hilarious), because it's sorta like 'haha, you once were a famous musician now no one even remembers you'. the worst is when you actually do remember the artist. this last season had the singer from bbmak on. wow. i remember bbmak (back here babyyyy ...), and i just felt terrible. this guy was once on TRL, now he's in a line-up of losers, while current, successful musicians and actors are laughing and pointing at him.

i hope i'm never like that guy. id rather be dead than a has-been.

albatross albatross albatross

ok so yea i havent posted on thousands in about forever. whats changed since then? well, we now have a real president, its almost turkey day, and i got a day job. duck, duck, GOOSE THAT IS NOT IN ANY WAY COOL OR AWESOME.

i also made my dj debut this weekend at a place called the mug lounge, on the lower east side of manhattan (13th and ave a). we randomly scoped this place out a few weeks back before seeing mstrkrft, and the bartender there happened to mention they just fired their friday night dj. wasting no time to hop on board, i laid down a fresh set of tunes for them, and they liked what they heard (to be fair, they asked me to play house, trance, european house, european trance, reggae, and old school hip-hop. or something like that. they have no idea what they want). i also met renee, who is 33 years old and a 32B bra size. she tried to request songs, but ended up just pointing at her breasts the entire night.

ive been trying to mix more disco and house, and have come to the conclusion that "doom house disco" is my new favorite genre. it doesnt exist. but it will.

heres some tunes of what comes close. first we have some doom, from a little-known dj in canada called hemingway. its gritty, its dark, and makes me think of blade runner, if it was directed by david lynch. then we skip the house and go straight to some disco, with a remix of sneaky sound system by breakbot. last, i bring you some house. HOUSE OF JEALOUS LOVERS that is, with a funked up high energy party pleaser that will have people to their feet in no time. tenderlions does the remix, and brings their upbeat sound to a classic.

hemingway - machine

sneaky sound system - when we were young (breakbot remix)

the rapture - house of jealous lovers (tenderlions remix)

now i have to go to a "meeting" about "market research" on the "7th floor". killself.

Albums of the Year (Heartfelt and Sincere Opinions)

This list was compiled in like 10 minutes.

Either there will be disagreement (no loss, probable gain), or someone will chime in with something better (super gain). I'm especially interested in the 1990-2003 years, because those will have solidified and proven some enduring value.

Guaranteed net positive gain!

2008 - The Dodos "Visiter"
2008 - Fleet Foxes "Fleet Foxes"
2007 - Animal Collective "Strawberry Jam"
2007 - Andrew Bird "Armchair Apocrypha"
2006 - Sonic Youth "Rather Ripped"
2006 - Sunset Rubdown "Shut Up I Am Dreaming"
2005 - Wolf Parade "Apologies to the Queen Mary"
2005 - Clap Your Hands Say Yeah "Clap Your Hands Say Yeah"
2004 - Arcade Fire "Funeral"
2003 - Motion City Soundtrack "I Am The Movie"
2002 - Wilco "Yankee Hotel Foxtrot"
2000 - Modest Mouse "The Moon & Antarctica"
1998 - Neutral Milk Hotel "In the Aeroplane Over the Sea"

la la la

man i haven't posted in what seems like ages! i've been working hard (one day a week), buying groceries on the regular (bread, salami, and sushi), and playing hardcore video games (i am now a proud level 40 in halo 3, also, travis beat grand theft auto 4).

how do i fit in the time to BLOG ???

if you haven't heard, travis barker (drummer from blink 182, prob the only good thing from that band) and dj am were seriously injured in a plane crash this past week. four other passengers died - that darned celebrity luck! the l.a. dj scene is a lot different than the east coast scene. it's a lot more glamorous, a lot more flashy, and a lot more narcissistic. dj am is part of the same high flyin', hollywood associatin' club family of steve aoki, etc.

and mia moretti.

mia moretti is yet another female dj for boys all over the world to drool over. there's not much more sexy than a girl spinning at a club. it's like watching a dog walk on its hind feet; at first it seems wrong, but then it seems so, so right. mia's been tearing up clubs in l.a. for a while, but she recently embarked on a nationwide tour with the summer's new pop sensation, katy perry. yea that's right, mia moretti is katy perry's personal dj. CAN IT GET ANY BETTER ??

(i mean what if they made out with each other omg)

katy perry - hot n cold (mia moretti remix)

can we get lunch some time, sasha frere-jones

sasha frere-jones on the laptop in music

whenever i have to explain how i dj without turntables, i find myself coming off as an idiot. i only use a laptop and a keyboard. people consider djing eponymous with turntables. that's slowly changing. hopefully.

fuck fashion

it's that time of year again, when even more stuffy socialites gather around than usual to worship the latest batch of clothing to grace the super tall super thin super models. fashion week hit nyc this weekend.

(to be honest, looking at the collections so far, i do like what i see)

fashion doesn't drive trends - it mostly reacts to them. music and arts pave the way for the clothes to come. styles and scenes are grown from artists, writers, and musicians. the simple beatnik style of black tights and tops. amy winehouse grows a beehive on her head that farms for heroin, and suddenly big hair crops on runways everywhere. the sex pistols have a group of followers so devoted to them that they are coined a name: the bromley contingent. among this group is billy idol and siouxsie sioux, who both go on to be punk rock icons, inspiring goth and punk fashions for decades. karl lagerfeld finds a muse in cat power.

perhaps i'm being too hard on fashion. i feel that its artistic scope is limited by its need for functionality or accessibility. though i guess the same goes for architecture, and stuff like furniture design. it's just that when i look back at the history of fashion, i always see it a half step behind music. it seems now, though, it's anyone's game.

anyway, this rambling was just an excuse to post justice's mix they did for dior homme's spring/summer '09 show in paris. because when i think dior homme, i think electro prog church rock.

justice - planisphère (Part 1)

justice - planisphère (Part 2)

justice - planisphère (Part 3)

justice - planisphère (Final)

footnote: karl lagerfeld is also the host of one of the fake radio stations in grand theft auto 4. wtf?

A fresh ear of corn.

So after a terrible day "at the office" (I really shouldn't be putting this in quotation marks- I know. But I can't actually write this in a non-satirical manner even though I do, in fact, work in an office.) I came home, only to realize that I had left my phone and keys on my bed that very same morning. I realized this right outside of the door to my apartment building.

It is at times like these that I must think of the happiest most rainbow and sunshine filled places ever before I lose my shit and send a Moltov cocktail firebomb into the police station across the street. Cue the hokey flashback noise, spinning camera blur, and take me back to Sunday afternoon...

Travis and I spent the good majority of our day wandering about Brooklyn, and ended up on an expansive roof in Bushwick. All the hip ass kids hid from the afternoon sun in the shady periphery, sunglasses still on, cigarettes dangling from lips. Burning accessories of cultivated boredom. In the far corner of the roof with a Manhattan skyline backdrop, some band rocked relentlessly even though nobody was really listening. They sucked, but their guitarist was wearing parachute pants, redeeming them in my eyes.

Post opening openers, opening for more openers (who would then watch those whom they opened for while getting good and drunk), Ninjasonik opened for Team Robespierre. Though Team Robespierre really rocked in the purest form of the word, I was still more charmed by the haphazard, half-assed performance of Ninjasonik. The sun was beginning to set, dipping the skyscape in gold, setting the mood for lyrics such as, "I'm a tight pants wearing ass n***a" (hint: not 'ninja'), and "I don't care if she got AIDS!" Ninjasonik lyrics may not be the most impressive examples of word-smithery in the industry, but they are enthusiastic to no end, and painfully hilarious.

Nearing the end of the set, the mosh-happy crowd swarmed around the duo, drunkenly improvising the words to "art school," a little ditty in which Ninjasonik professes their love for arty girls. This is my happy place. The police station across the street still stands.

Turntable Tips Ep. 1

Hi there kids!

Get ready for a new feature that will explore both the world of old music and the wonder that is vinyl records. Today's installment is brought to you from Mojo Music Studio in Franconia, NH. The shop has thousands of LP records, and the owners hung out with me for a good part of this morning while I ran around like a kid in a candy shop playing unheard of (and largely unheard) cover tunes, strange electronic music from the '80s, and high-speed folk music (see today's tip). It's a pretty good feeling when you drop the needle in a record shop and everyone is stumped about the track you're playing. It's also a lot of fun to read the notes that radio DJs used to write on the covers of records; today I found, "Don't play track 1! It says fucking." Radio work is not for the faint of heart.

Today's Tip: When you're in the mood for a square dance, or have a hankering for some down-home bluegrass picking but have slim bluegrass pickings in your record collection, what can you do? You could go on-line and download some Earl Scruggs or Doc Watson, but digital music just doesn't have the same warmth as vinyl. Instead, try spinning some of your old Dylan LPs or any other folksy 33 at 45 RPM. Suddenly you've got something you can stomp along with, guitars will magically morph into banjos, and your friends will be feeding you moonshine like you were raised in the Smokies.

Re-Hip: If you're into electronic music, experimental rock, and funky beats, then check out Robert Fripp. He was the guitarist for King Crimson, but he also produced some interesting work in the sudios during the '70s and '80s. He has worked with the likes of Brian Eno and Andy Summers, so expect soundscapes, deep beats, and delay. If you're familiar with Eno but want to here something a bit more raw/funky/cutting edge than U2, give Fripp a twirl on the stacks.

from tokyo to toronto

howe-munny says his favorite band name is the toronto-based girls are short. i like it too, because girls should be short. and they are. and they should all be able to sing. and they can. in my mind, every girl i see on the street can sing beautiful melodies off the top of their heads. don't ruin that for me, hayley.

girls are short are also good friends with another canadian indie-electro-pop outfit, the one-man wonder shaw-han liem, also known as i am robot and proud. do all canadian bands have awesome names ?? seems like they do. i have a monster boner for monster animals, so canadian bands are right up my alley: the unicorns, dragonette, even frog eyes. i mean, come on, wolf parade started the whole "wolf" band name phenomenon. then again, that shit came full circle and brought us AIDS wolf, also from montreal. ugh.

remember the tenori-on post? here's i am robot and proud being introduced for the first time (seriously) to this wonderful machine with his own custom model, from the inventor himself. he takes to it like a fuckin natural:

big in japan

music-wise, japan is both the beginning and the end. styles go there to die, be reincarnated, and relished by millions of people living an incessantly adolescent life. yet still japan produces some of the best new ideas, music, and culture that have so obviously permeated the entire world. this is a country that has produced merzbow, boris, and now, one of the coolest musical toys i've ever seen: the tenori-on.

created a few years ago by a japanese artist, the tenori-on is basically a screen of LED switches that can be activiated in various ways to "create an actively evolving musical soundscape". music, visualized through blinking lights. it is beautiful, it is powerful, and it is just a hint of what technology can offer music to come in the future. holding one of these must be magical. it's versatile enough that it can be used to do most anything, from inspiring electronic and experimental musicians, to bringing old tunes (i use the term liberally, as this song dropped the bomb everywhere only earlier this year), to new life.

i bring you the oh so beautiful and talented little boots, a female singer from england, doing a cover of "ready for the floor" by hot chip. on the tenori-on.



interesting tidbit: little boots's song "stuck on repeat" (which i previously posted a remix of) was produced by joe goddard of hot chip.